The weather where I live has been very hot the past several days (it started cooling down last night - Thank goodness!). Since it's not even the first day of summer yet, there's still plenty of opportunity for things to heat up here again. So, I thought it would be helpful (and amusing) to post some ideas for things to do on hot weather days. Some of these are good ideas and some of them bad, but I'll let you decide for yourself which are which.
1. Go home and take a cool shower.
2. Go to the home of a neighbor that you've never met, when they aren't home, and take a shower there.
3. Put on sunblock.
4. Coat yourself in vegetable oil and let the sun deep-fry you until your skin is the texture of an onion ring.
5. Buy a new swimsuit and go swimming at a local lake or outdoor pool.
6. Buy a hazmat suit and go swimming at a local waste water treatment facility.
7. Exercise in the cool morning.
8. Exercise at the hottest time of day in hopes of meeting a cute E.R. nurse after you collapse from heat stroke.
9. Wear sunglasses that make you look like a movie star.
10. Wear ski goggles all summer long, day and night, and tell everyone that you are waiting for the first snow fall.
11. Go surfing.
12. Go surfing in shark infested waters wearing a wetsuit that smells like raw hamburger.
13. Eat an ice cream cone.
14. Eat an ice cream cone after it has fallen into the street by licking the melted ice cream off the pavement.
15. Drink lots of icy cold water.
16. Drink lots of water out of your toilet bowl like you're a german shepherd.
17. Go to the beach and build a sandcastle.
18. Go to a farm and build castle out of chicken manure.
19. Have a cool, refreshing tropical drink after work, such as a mai tai or a pina colada.
20. Have fifteen cool, refreshing tropical drinks, while still at work, and lose your job. If your job
is in law enforcement, medicine or, if you are an airline pilot, have twenty drinks instead.
21. Heat up your barbeque and grill your dinner.
22. Heat up your barbeque and sit on it.
23. Try to cool your home using a fan or air conditioning.
24. Try to cool your home by cranking up the heater, as high as it goes, in an attempt to bully the
existing heat into backing down.
25. Have a picnic.
26. Have a picnic on top of an ant hill after drizzling honey on yourself to give them a sweeter meal.
27. Put on mosquito repellent.
28. Don't put on mosquito repellent. Instead, when one is biting you, capture it, and torture it
into confessing all its crimes against humanity.
29. Run through your garden sprinklers.
30. Run through someone else's garden sprinklers, naked, except for a big floppy sunhat. Sing "Zippity-Do-Da" the whole time, loud enough that you don't even hear the police car when it pulls up.
Until I type again,
Kami
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